You Can Hold Multiple Truths and You Can Hold Multiple Pains: Highlights from our Building Bridges in the Fight Against Hate Webinar

“When you know someone, and you go to school with someone, or you engage in dialogue with someone, or you go to school together, and you overcome some of the contradictions that divide people, you can have that multitude of empathies and recognition of truths.”
- Eva Armour

What does it look like to lean into conflict and difference rather than turning away in fear or anger? What happens when we prioritize our relationships over political divisions? As part of Facing History’s webinar series In the Face of Hate: A Conversation Series on Combating Antisemitism and Racism in the 21st Century, four bridge builders met earlier this month with courage and compassion to share their experiences and expertise communicating across conflict and difference—a practice paramount for all of us to foster in these deeply polarizing times. The discussion was both cathartic and emotionally nourishing, leaving listeners energized and inspired to apply the strategies shared by these panelists in their own communities.

The Building Bridges in the Fight Against Hate webinar featured two religiously-observant high school students, Easha (who is Muslim) and Daniel (who is Jewish); the two teens co-founded an interfaith club at their high school two years ago and became close friends in the process. Joining Easha and Daniel in conversation were Lee Gordon, cofounder of the Hand in Hand school in Israel, a network of integrated public schools serving Arab and Jewish children; and Chief Impact Officer Eva Armour of Seeds of Peace, a youth leadership program that brings young people together in regions of conflict to practice dialogue techniques that shift attitudes and perceptions while fostering empathy and respect.

The term “moral beauty”—coined by Dacher Keltner, founder of the Greater Good Science Center—describes the type of awe we experience in the presence of someone who demonstrates “exceptional virtue, character, and ability, marked by a purity and goodness of intention and action.” ¹ Listening to these four panelists is to experience the feeling that Keltner evokes with this phrase.

During this robust and inspiring conversation, a few central strategies emerged for communicating successfully and building connections across conflict and difference:

1. Relationship building: nurturing authentic relationships that center each other’s shared humanity become the foundation of working through conflict and reaching out across difference. 
2. Active and inquisitive listening: hard conversations require the kind of listening that is done with genuine curiosity, rather than in order to respond in turn with an opposing point. 
3. Remaining in the gray: meaningful and compassionate dialogue means moving away from binary thinking (right/wrong, win/lose, good/bad) and toward nuance while holding multiple—even conflicting—truths at once.
4. Embracing and normalizing communicating across difference and conflict: acknowledging that conflict and different perspectives are part of the human experience and not inherently bad helps us grow more comfortable communicating about our differences rather than fearing them and remaining entrenched in our echo chambers.
5. Fostering spaces for empathy building: the importance of creating spaces for in-person “human-to-human” connection (as opposed to virtual spaces that can encourage divisiveness) where we can see beyond someone’s political stance and actually bear witness to what they are experiencing emotionally.

We were so grateful to be able to facilitate this powerful conversation that left participants and listeners alike feeling uplifted and hopeful about a path forward through the turmoil and divisiveness of our current moment. The two student bridge builders Daniel and Easha are featured in the latest episode of the podcast This Teenage Life, a global youth dialogue and podcasting program that features teen voices on a diverse array of relevant topics. You can listen to Easha and Daniel’s episode here!

• 1https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/whats_the_most_common_source_of_awe